Noticing

Shamanic sight is said to be between the worlds. We walk with one foot in each. As I've become a brain geek with the last few years of training and practice, I realize so much of what the ancients have been telling us is about brain chemistry. They framed it in metaphor, in fairy tale, in myth. They told it with animals, with elements, with poetic imagry. They told it that way so that our mind would be engaged.

We remember the stories that way. We remember the characters. It's like animating academics. Really good technique for longevity, but what happens, is in getting it bare bones simple they've eliminated people that understand the intricacies. Well yes and no.

Because one you begin the exploration for yourself, and it is always a personal journey, you get to the ah ha moments. The longer you explore, the more ah has that you string together.

We are the observers. We watch. We also participate, but at a higher level, in a different way.  We choose. So becoming shamanic means becoming the observer of interaction, and watching the space between, which means the energetic interaction, not the drama.

The effects of the drama. How do you change the course of a river? First you watch it. You must understand the flow before you can begin to know where or how to shift it. And then you do it with tiny nudges, and more watching. I think there is a myth from the movies of the shaman being loud big and in your face with masks and rattles and smoke and invoking BIG changes. That's Hollywood. It's dramatic.

More are quiet. Sit at the back of the room. Track the energy. Make a small shift like changing their seat. Then watching the room shift. They watch the room, and they watch what no one else is seeing. To become 'shamanic' means to become someone who notices what others miss. It means becoming an observer. If you intersect at just the right moment, you can use very little 'effort'. It's not about brut force. It's about invitation.

My birthday and what I wish for you

It's my birth day today.

When I was little I remember asking my mother if there was a party in heaven when we died because we were born back.

It made perfect sense to me that it happened that way. We die there when we are born here and there is a celebration of our emergence here on this plane. It is a celebration of the transition.

When we transition out, and go to the next place do THEY have a celebration of our emergence there?

My mother said I was a strange child. But it still makes perfect sense. When we are born here, do they mourn our passing from there or do they celebrate?

Why can't we imagine celebrations at both ends, on both sides of the veil?
When my Grandmother passed in England, I saw her, beautiful, radiant, floating and free.
I had decided on the spur of the moment that Friday to fly to CA to be with my mother. I said to my husband, " think I'll fly to CA for the weekend. I feel like I need to be with my mom." I bought the ticket and went.

My Grandmother was 96. A good age. She hadn't been well the last few years, but nothing really wrong either. My aunt in the UK called my mother that evening and said Nan didn't seem to be doing well. We spent the evening talking about her, laughing over memories of visits. I love my Nan deeply and she has been a huge part of my life even though we were at a distance. We would spend summers in the UK when I was a child.

In the morning my mother and I were having coffee in the kitchen. It was maybe 9:30am. I quite suddenly felt a huge fatigue wash over me and I said to my mother, "I'm going to lay down for a bit." NOT my usual thing to do.

I laid down and within moments saw my Grandmother floating before me, barefoot, hair loose, face radiant and upturned. Her arms were spread. She was wearing a while nightgown with lavender smocking and tiny lavender flowers. She looked beautiful and free. She didn't say anything to me but was in a rapture, face upturned as she floated up in a bath of radiant light.

The phone rang. I woke instantly. My mother came in and said "Nan has passed."
I said, "I know! I just saw her! She's beautiful!"

So, do we celebrate that release, that movement and change or do we mourn their passing from us?
And so my question still sits with me 49 years later. Why do we celebrate the arrival and mourn the passing? Why not celebrate the transition both ends and both ways.

I've heard it said it's so much harder to be born than it is to die. And from what I've witnessed, it's true. A friend passed quickly from one sharp pain. A sudden heart attack. His wife was sobbing and he showed up behind her, that very evening, hours after crossing, and was doing a little dance.

He said "If I'd known it was this easy, I would have done it a long time ago!"

I said "It's too soon to joke!" and he winked at me! Bold as anything. He was fine.

The moment of our crossing-I think it's already chosen. I think we should live every day full out, celebrate that we are here, in this moment, to live to learn to laugh, and when we meet that moment when we cross into the next story, we greet it like the train pulling into the station. "Here I go!" Celebrate everything. Always. Laugh out loud.

I want to go, arms wide open. I want to go in the right moment, I don't want to rush it mind you, I love being alive, and I want to feel free now, then and free to meet it with my eyes open and my heart open. What could be better than that?

My husband's grandmother, in a little village in Italy, took her bath one Sunday and called all the family and said "I'm dying today. Come and see me." She dressed in her best clothes, laid on the bed, paid court, said her good byes, and that evening crossed in her sleep. That's the way to meet it-knowing that train is coming! It's ok. Say your hellos every day, say your good byes every day.

The Tibetans turn their tea cup over as if it's their last. And in the morning when they are alive again, they say thanks for THIS DAY as if it is their only day to live.

What if we only had this day? Just this one. You woke up this morinng in this place, and there is only today. What would you do, who would you talk to, how would you spend your time? What's important? Today is all there is.

The very best thing we can do to help someone when they are transitioning, is to free them of the burdens held in the emotional body, today. Free ourselves. Lighten up. Church's call it absolution. Forgiveness. Telling the secrets. Lightening ourselves and them. Dialog. Listen. Speak. Clear. Shamanic hospice work is about just that. It is witnessing, and it is freeling them. We are all minister's to each other.

Our limbic brain is the gatekeeper of our emotional pain as well as our emotional brilliance. We can be brilliant when we free ourselves. And if we don't let it go, it does hang to our luminous selves like so much dense energy, weighing us down.

Lighten yourself now. Lighten your loved ones now, so can live as light, and not wait 'til death's door to find the light next.

Talk! Forgive! Understand. Say thank you. Observe what they are demonstrating and what you are demonstrating to others. Witness. And move on!

Life is a lived on an edge. I think of riding a bicycle. You can certainly ride along on a beautiful sunny road, head up and with a small basket in front of you. You can see that it is easy to balance, to look about you, to move forward.

And then imagine you are riding that bike with your arms and back saddled with huge piles of stuff. Imagine others handing you parcels that you strap on. Imagine it! You can still move forward but at greater and greater cost. Notice where your head is as you look at that picture of yourself riding that burdened bicycle. But still you go on, taking all that with you to some destination that's up ahead.

Now imagine riding uphill with all that...
Now imagine that the weather changes and it is pelting down rain...wind...a hurricane...

When do we let it go? Is it worth holding on to all that stuff? And yet we do. We continue to hold it, to carry it. It takes significant life force energy to move forward with all that. And yet we do.

I think it's because we don't believe we can put it down.
It's up to us. Changing our mind and putting it down is all there is.

Imagine it. Imagine that you, riding the bicycle starts to shake off the backpack and the saddlebags. The packages and containers falling off. Maybe she had a pile on her head too. Watch it fall off. And watch how she changes. Posture. Breathing. Eyes.  Speed.

That basket in front, that small basket, put in it only what is important and necessary. What do you choose to put in that basket. Just notice.

God has given us a great vehicle to move through this life - our body. Walk on the earth with your two feet and give thanks. Yes, thank you. Eyes up. Head back. LAUGH outloud even if you have to pretend with HO HO HO HA HA HA HEE HEE HEE

Do it today and always! Today is my birthday and I want YOU to laugh!

Sensory Experience

We were in the first night of Reiki class a few weeks ago. We went through a sensory exercise I start many of the classes with, to teach you that you are experiencing the world through you senses.

But today I realize, that as I invite you to imagine you are experiencing something else, and your senses begin to give you that data, even sensory data is subject to your MIND!

You experience, via your external senses, what your MIND tells you. NOT necessarily what is there.
Ah ha!
I've been teaching this for years and I suddenly realize it in a whole new way.

Your sensory experience is only dialed to what your MIND tells you.
So, the Ice Man can run up Mt Gilboa barefoot in jockey shorts and be fine because he tells his external senses that it's warm, he's fine.

Is it hypnosis?
WHAT ISN'T!!!

Do you see? Do you get it?
EVERY experience you have, every day, is only dialed to what you have DECIDED it is.
SO, is it a good day, a bad day, a tough day, a mild day. Is it fun, is it hard?

Literally the very sensory experience you have is based on your MIND'S decision about it BEFORE you've had it.

So a young woman came in that had a reaction to strawberries. Even looking at the berries would cause her skin to redden. Is that a valid sensory experience or is her MIND causing it? I used to think that it was her heightened sensitivity reacting to it from a distance, because even with her eyes closed, she would react. Hmmmmm

Now I wonder? New question! New possibilities! Remember-it is only true until it isn't true and a new question gives way to new explorations! A new hunt! A new game!

If I tell myself that I am hot, am I? If I change my mind, does my body temperature go down?
If I tell myself I am tired, am I? And if I change my mind, do I get energized?
If I tell myself I am happy, sad, scared, grateful, does my sensory experience change?

Try it-as an experiment. Just like in class. What happens?
Blows your mind about how to tell what is real doesn't it?

Hearing our Thoughts

So this morning, I looked at my bathroom floor and thought, "I didn't mop this floor very well. I'll have to do it again."

Then the toilet overflowed! In all the years we have been in this house, the toilet has never overflowed. It has plugged up, but never never overflowed.

So there I am, within moments...mopping the floor...really really well! We get what we think.
We really do!

Shamanic Studies

The world is a friendly place. It supports us, talks to us, relates to us.
It really is our friend. Or it should be.
And if yours isn't, why isn't it?

Today. Right now. As you look out at the beautiful blue sky, the crisp air, the trees bare and waiting for snow to brush them-what is there to be afraid of?

As I ask that question-notice your thoughts!
Do they go to the future?
Or do they go to the past?
Did they jump time? Bring your mind back to now. To this moment. Again.

What is there to be afraid of?
Breathe in and out. Feel the air.
The elements themselves are in reciprocity with us.
The air. We can't live without it.
The water.
The earth.
The fire.
We need these energies. We are made up of them. We function because of them.

Are you afraid of the air? Of the water? Is it dirty? Is it toxic?
Or are your thoughts about the air and the water, toxic?
And your thoughts are only the rationalizing of your 'higher' mind, trying to make sense of the emotions that are churning around.

The emotions are reactions.
What are you reacting to?
Find the thought before the feeling. Own it. Pull it out, examine it from all sides. This is what has stirred the emotional body. Your own thought. Your mind.

Your mind is creating all the time.
Your mind can be changed.
And when you change your mind, you change your reactions and you change your feelings.
Change your feelings and you change your thoughts.
Change your thoughts and you change your experience.

You change your outer world by changing your inner one.
Every great thinker on this planet, across all cultures, has come to the same understanding...
pick up any metaphysical book. It's all there.
Pick up the Bible, one of the greatest esoterical writings of all time!

Jesus was a shaman. He walked the earth. He had a body. He told us a formula and we can follow him and do what he did. In fact, he encourages it. Do you think that shamanism is a religion? Bah!
Shamanism is an engagement. It is an invitation. It is a personal invitation to journey into yourself. Are you brave enough to find out what is going on inside you?

Get quiet. It's all there. You are waiting for yourself.
Wake up!

Wayra - Wind

This is lovely-it is a spiritual embrace of the Native Peoples of the 4 corners, north and south america.
The heartbeat of humanity-


We as human beings living in peace. The peaceful path.

First Night of Class

I usually love the first night of the introduction to shamanism class. I usually love the first night of any of the classes. We have just started Reiki as well.  I ask them 'why this class?' I watch them while they answer.

Who is answering from the mental plane-staying in what they know, what they think they know, what they've already taken? The expert that wants the class to know it?
Who comes to the class like a new born, open and curious and willing to play?
Who is wounded and wanting an answer to some inexplicable feeling that is there that they can't describe and can't tell anyone about?
Who is really in the wrong room and probably won't come back?

I'm not often wrong. I've played all the parts myself at one time or another over the last 20 years. Twenty years! Whew. That's getting to be a considerable amount of time in the linear. In shamanic time-it's just a moment ago. It's now. I can step back to my first day of my first class. I can step back to the first time I sensed the energetic field of someone else and was surprised.  I can step back instantly to the first time I fumblingly 'felt' a chakra and was sure I was doing it wrong.

I can remember so clearly the first time I sat with my stones and my cloth and thought, "What am I doing with these toys?" I was so adult, so critical. I remember watching some of the others as they played, and thinking "I wish I could do that!" But I didn't seem to be able to. It was a lost art to me. I wanted to. I looked around and wondered what they knew that I didn't?

And then remembering that even as a child, I didn't really know how to play. Play was something I put away when my world got very scary and very tumultuous. Our deep inside self says "it isn't safe to play", and it gets put away.

I was 35 and I didn't know how to play with my children. I watched their innocence and delight. I would sit on the floor with them with their toys and imitate them. The joy and wonder! And I would think "when did I lose that?" I was a very good adult. I had been a very good adult since I was about four. Maybe even younger. Maybe as young as a year and a half when  I got out of the hospital. My mother says I was changed. I was. The child was gone. Put away. Not gone forever though, and this I can attest to.

I found my way back to my child. She was deep inside. And I even thought for awhile it might be better for her to stay there. But it isn't. It's always better for that lost inner child to come home to us.

So. There we are. The first night of class. And I am inviting them to play. Come and play with me, with yourself, with your own mind. Now. This moment. For two hours, suspend that critical adult. Leave her/him outside wit h your shoes, and come into my world. Come into your inner world. Come this way.

But this month for the first time, before I could even weave the spell, offer the invitation, there was immense challenge in one of the classes. What IS this? Why am I here? I smile.

You are here by choice. Some inner part of you prompted you to click and register.

But no. IF someone else has signed you up because THEY think you need it, it is not your choice. Then it is an intervention and there is opposition in you. Maybe you are able to stay open minded for 2 hours and find out why you are there, or maybe you are too angry. Anger is always about fear.

The challenge to let go of your defenses is always fearful.
But.
The very universe herself is challenging us right now, right here, this moment and the next one, to do exactly that.

And. Shamanism and Reiki are a challenge to find a new path. To find a way to let go of the shield of anger and opposition that you have held your entire life to 'keep you safe'. What if you let down your defenses, and you let yourself play? What then? Who will you be? And what if you don't recognize yourself?

Whatever you have read about Shamanism, about Reiki about any of the healing arts, my invitation to you is to play. Find the lost inner child and come back to yourself, the self you were born to be. This work is an invitation to find your way out of the illusion of dark as your safe place and back to your own light.

Don't follow me. Follow yourself. The way is through the heart. And the way is back to embracing all of who you are. If any of these classes didn't appeal to you, try again. Find another one, or a book, or simply get quiet and reach up and out. The energy is all around you and it will meet you and your answers are there.

Against Medical Advice-James Patterson true story

This is the amazing story of strength  that I read while on the way to Mexico. Riveting. I picked it up in the airport and had finished it before we touched down.

A story of true strength and speaks to the power of our MIND and what happens when we change it, and take back our power and our choice.

Here are some audio clips-follow the link.

http://www.jamespatterson.com/media/audio/againstMedicalAdvice_ch1.mp3

New Mayan Archeological Find!

Embedded video from CNN Video

Shamanic Class has started at the U

We're out in Murray this time for Shamanism 1.

and what a fun group!
But with all the delays, what has occurred is numerologically interesting...
We were 10, but now have 11.
The class got postponed twice so it didn't start until 11-2
The room number is 111

Can't wait to see what is up!
Just noticing!

Art Show at the Oasis

Catherine Ann has hung her wonderful art at the OASIS cafe for the month of Nov. If you get a chance to go in and be delighted please do!!!

They look wonderful!
Her website is down but stop in and take a look at the art. I love it!

Mexican Butterfly!

Butterfly having a bit of a drink while in Mexico!  Great picture Laura!

What is going on with the airlines!?

I've traveled alot but I have never had trouble like lately. I have to again think it's a cosmic message.

I'm seriously listening to my own thoughts too because I gotta say we have more power than we even realize! (I feel like Bullwinkle pulling out the Monster from the hat and saying "Don't know my own strength!")

I'm in Milwaukee. I have a flight to Boston. I am on the way to the airport, I look at my ticket in my hand and think "Shoot. WIsh I had booked the direct flight. I don't want to go to Detroit first."

I get to the airport and guess what!? My flight has been CANCELLED! I am ON the flight, buckled in no less when the pilot comes over the intercom to tell us we have TWO flat tires and there are no spares and so we have no plane. We have to unload, they have to put us on other flights and I end up on a direct flight with a different airline. I get there 20 mins earlier too. Hmmmmm

I'm then in Boston. I am checking in the night before and I think "I wonder if they will cancel my flight again? Nah." Then I decide "Ok. If they do, I want a direct flight!" I was supposed to go to New York first.

I am totally not kidding with this folks. I get to the airport, and as I am handing them my suitcase-that I have PAID my baggage fee for, they say "oops. Your flight has been cancelled." Are you kidding me??? She says nope. Go stand in that 3 hour line with all those other unhappy people and we will try and get you on another flight."

I stand in the never ending line. People are laying on the floor it is taking so long. I get to the front and she says, "we can get you to La Guardia, and then you can get your baggage, get a cab, go across town to JFK and check in again. You have an hour and a half. Then we can get you on a flight to Atlanta, and from there a flight to Denver. Then you can get to SLC right?"

I say "NOT without a plane!"

She says "Oh. We don't have anything leaving Denver." Oops.

We finally agree that if I spend another night, they can put me on...yep...a direct flight to SLC. Can you believe it??? But it meant I couldn't be back to start the shamanic class on Monday night. I was in transit.

I hear horror stories from fellow travelers. 11 hour delays in Houston. Endless stories. It's not just one airline, it's happening all over. I'm seriously unhappy.

Then I have this thought about my next trip. But no. I have a direct flight on my return. I mean, what can go wrong with a direct fliglht? I suddenly worry about it. i think "Hmmmm. I hope everything is ok with the flight to Mexico and back?"

I get an email from the airlines. My flight has been rerouted. I will be going to go through customs in Phoenix. I am not direct. I am and I'm not. I get back on the same flight after a few hours. Instead of getting in at 3:46pm, I will be getting in at 7:30pm, and hope this isn't going to inconvenience you.

NO! I will miss my class on Monday night! I will not be back in time to teach. Again. I am seriously unhappy. The airlines says "Sorry." I get an apology and 2500 miles. Big whoop.

So if any of you are signed up for the shamanic class, and you are wondering about your flaky teacher...I am grounded for the month of Nov. I leave again on Dec 2. Maybe Dec will be better than Oct? I am going to watch my thoughts.

Do we get the thought as a precognitive hunch, or are we creating the future we are imagining?

What happened to the mouse?

I had a friend email that she was on the blog and liked the mouse story. I thought "what mouse story?" I realized it's been awhile since I've posted! AND that there was more to the story. Poor little mousey.

So, I let the little guy scoot off into my neighbor's yard with the firm admonition to avoid my cat right...which I figured would be enough of a warning in herself, right? Mice aren't known for their brains though. They are cat food remember.

I leave town and when I return there are little tale tell signs of mice in the house. In my kitchen drawers no less! Invasion! Now this is really a rather rude response I think to my generosity! I did let him off. He wasn't supposed to go tell his friends I was a soft touch.

My husband has been setting traps, but I gotta tell ya - if you thought he was squeemish about picking up a live mouse, you'd have to really see the toe dancing over trying to touch a dead one. We didn't catch any so stop worrying. The man could not set a trap! Oh he could set it, but he couldn't catch anything. Good thing we aren't trapping for our food for winter-we would starve. (sorry honey, it's the truth). Come on. You put a piece of cheese on the trap, and wham. Quick. Clean.

I know this because when I was ten my girlfriend and I decided we were going to go into business selling mice to the pet stores and our friends. We were going to make a fortune! We got our breeding stock-three females and a male.

I'll cut to the chase-we ended up with thirteen baby mice that all got out of the cage one night and my mother had an ongoing mouse-battle that I still hear about. Let's just say...three cats couldn't keep up with it and we were out of business. Too bad because we really picked some breeders I tell ya!

I'm not squeemish about mice. But he is.

So there he is, my sweetie, mouse traps all over the drawers, full of cheese, and he tells me he keeps adding fresh cheese every night. Hmmmm. I look and there are mice droppings everywhere which means the traps are being visited and the cheese is being sampled. Not so stupid mice! I take back the crack about cat food. We are feeding the mice! They are having a party in my kitchen! Where the heck is my cat! Some queen mouse chaser she is! I think she's upset because I let her catch go and she has decided to let us fend for ourselves and frankly I'd probably feel the same way.

"Hmf. They think they are so smart? Let them deal!" She's pretty imperial as it is. There's no living with her now as she watches us in our mouse issue.

So. Since I'm the shaman ya know, I get out my rattle and my florida water and I say, "hey guys, we had a deal! What's up!?" Since everything means something, this has to have a message from the universe just for us, right?

I look up "MOUSE" on the internet again. Oh thank you great GOOGLE. "If mouse has entered your life, ask yourself if you are neglecting trival but necessary things. Mouse people can make the simplest task fraught with difficulty."

I look at the plethora of mousetraps in my kitchen. I mean seriously. He has probably got 20 mouse traps going. He has placed them behind every drawer, in every drawer. Now 20 might not sound like a lot to you, but they are only coming into one section of the kitchen. One set of cupboards. No where else. 2 large drawers, and 3 small ones. That's it. 20 mousetraps. Mountains of cheese. We are feeding the neighborhood! Party time in rodent land. Ok ok. Maybe this is his issue? Maybe he is mouse and not me? You mean this might NOT be about me after all? Is that possible? Nah.

"Honey. Could we maybe find a better mousetrap than this one?" I'm seriously worried about opening a drawer. I am leaving town again, and I tell him I figure if he catches one he will have to pay a neighbor to come take it outside. He growls at me. Men don't like having a flaw, and they certainly don't like it if we poke fun at it. Oh but come on...oh ok. I'll be nice.

I clean all the drawers out, really well, all the traps are freed from death duty and tossed. Never did like those things. I sit down and talk into the drawers. Serious. I spit florida water and tell them they have two choices, but the party is over. They can move on down the street, or it is war. I am taking back the neighborhood. All the utensils and pots and pans go in the dishwasher on high. Hey-they wash up just fine.

I am not neglecting the little things anymore. I am not fearful of life. I am focused. I am shaman! I am seeing the larger picture-drawers without droppings. I have an image of little mousey dancers dragging out in the wee hours...tuckered out from the party at my house but spreading the word they have to find a new place to dance.

Upshot is ... no party at our house anymore! We are mouse free. Was it the talk with the mice? Was it taking back my power? Was it the florida water? Was it putting my cat in the crawl space under the house for a few nights...who knows? I only know it worked!

Monarch and the Light Fantastic

Magical day today!

This morning we went to witness a friend releasing her newest hatched Monarch Butterfly from the ... nest?

It was girl, of course, and she stayed for ages on the flowers then went into the apple tree. Girl Monarchs do not have a black dot on the orange part of the lower wings. Boys do. Girls are rare.

Then we took a wonderful long mountain hike, 3 of us, and went all over. Finally, 5 hours later we are walking back towards my house. Across town, and we spot a butterfly. Yep. It is our little girl! WHAT are the odds I ask ya, of seeing the same butterfly in another part of town??? I would think pretty high! Pretty rare. Pretty magical.

We don't have Monarchs up here. I've never seen one before. It was the girl we set free this morning...

So the meaning of butterfly?
Transmutation
Dance of JOY!
Symbol of change. Symbol of the soul.
Take stock of the most important things in your life.

Mouse in the House

When we do the earth walk, we are connecting into the everyday signs and signals that cross our path. We accept that we are in a constant dialog, and as such, we respond to, and with those messages.

Now, my husband says "BA. Not everything means something!" Course, this is the man that also has a hard time with Angels and God, but no trouble with Demons. Somehow, that sort of reverse metaphysical superstition confounds me. That is how we got into this religious mess on the planet in the first place! Too much superstition and not enough of each individual paying attention themselves. Ok-that is enough before my second cup of coffee.

Back to my story: I was on the way to making a nice pot of morning coffee. You know, anticipating that early morning coffee smell already. I've had lasik so I'm not blind in the AM as I used to be. Good thing. But still. Morning eyes are blurry.
Something was on the floor.

Now at first I thought it was a ... you know. I little cat urp of a hairball. It was slimey and the right color - dark like her fur. But it wasn't. There I am peering down at this little mound on my floor, bare feet, nightgown,and it's a dead mouse.

I thought 'ah, that's what the cat was up to last night' because she had been carrying on, wanting to come into the bedroom. I will have to admit I stood and entertained the image of our cat bounding onto the bed with the dead mouse in her lips, dangling it over my husband's face...see, he hates mice. Alive, dead, dying, he can't stand to see them, and for sure can't touch one. My hero.

I'm not sure why, but he does. And over the years our cats have gifted us many! I can still see him standing naked at the sliding doors, stamping one foot yelling for me to get it while looking like he was about to throw up. I've even had a few cruel moments of role reversal where I have chased him around the house with one... but that was a long time ago when I was young and not as sensitive and mature as I am now.

When I bent to pick it up though, it was warm and soft, and I thought that Coco must have just finished. It's fur was wet. She was asleep on the chair. I saw the whiskers twitch and realized it was alive, barely.

Have you ever seen a cat play with a mouse? I watched her once. It was the most horrifying game I've ever seen, and I broke it up then, which wasn't easy. She was into it. Catch and release and recatch, sometimes throwing it up in the air. The mouse would start to get away and she would catch it again. From her position it was a game. From the mouse's position it was torture.

I held this tiny mouse in my hands, like the bird the other day, and thought about life and how short it is and how we all need to take care of each other. I thought that he had just had an awful night for sure. And I thought about how it was the first time in 17 years with this cat that I'd ever found a live one.

I felt the reiki start, and I walked outside with him. I walked away from the house, down the street to the field, in my nightgown, and when he started to perk up I put him under a tree. He looked at me for a moment before moving further under the tree and out of the way of the early birds. (wouldn't that be just like life! Out of one mess and into another!)

So back to does it mean anything or is it just something that happened this morning?
Mouse medicine: pay attention to the details, and get things done. That's a bit of it for sure for me...mouse is either too fixated on the little bits or it's a warning TO pay attention to the little bits.

But I also thought about the game and how the cat, my cat, doesn't usually let the mouse go. Is she getting old? Or was this another sort of message? Where in our life have we been caught in a game that doesn't feel like we are going to get out of? YES! It fits there! Could it be that they are finishing with us?

Details. Mouse is about the little things. Work on the little things to attain the big things. Focus. Are you trying to do too many things at one time? LOL well there is the lesson of my life, and IS exactly what I felt this weekend. Scattered in too many directions and not doing them in balance. Well!

What else? Where have I been fearful of life perhaps? Have I been worried about 'the cat' getting me, and have held myself back from roaming 'the house'? Is this a message that I have 'gotten away'? Or will?

Well, one of the things about working with signs is you don't HAVE the answer yet...you just keep noticing. We notice our response, our engagement. We notice what shows up. We notice our reaction. We notice what comes next.

Porcupine Life

There we are, my walking buddy and I, out in the middle of the aspens. It's a full moon, and we suddenly both realize at the same that the path we are on is a lot further from the road than it ever feels like in the daytime, and that the moon isn't as bright as we had thought it would be.

It had rained in the day, and there were clouds. At the same moment we both had the feeling of 'animal!' and I said "turn your light on would you?" She had brought her little flashlight, laughing that we probably wouldn't need it.

Now luckily, she laughed but listened to her intuition right? Because there isn't a bright moon out. Later there will be. 2 hours after we get home it will be like daylight almost, but not then, and not in the woods. Right then and there it's dark and we both feel like Little Red Riding Hood.

At that moment her husband calls. "You girls ok out there? No Moose?" Now tell me these guys aren't intuitive? What did we do before cell phones?

We are walking along now feeling pretty sure of ourselves and laughing at ourselves and our silly fright, when there in the beam is a dark mound up ahead. It looks like a rock in the road, hunched. Is it something? Is it a rock? Is it alive? Is it dangerous?

It's too small to be a Moose. It isn't moving. We aren't sure but with a light in your hand you feel much braver! Funny thing about light.

It was a Porcupine! He looked up at us and waddled off the path. They don't move fast do they? I've never seen one-not in 35 years of living in the mountains. Just the quills in the snout of my dog when she would tangle with them-unsuccessfully. I learned to snip the end of the quill off to release the pressure on the tip that is caught in the skin, and it will slide out.

Remember that if you ever get one. Wicked things those quills. You'd only have that happen once to give them a wide berth the next time. (what does that mean anyway, wide berth?)

Porcupine: trust and faith. Innocence and wonder. Porcupine reminds you not to get caught in the chaos of the world. Ok. That fits for me. We've had a lot of drama this week, and it's not mine, and it is. And it's not. Ok. So don't get caught up in it.

"Open your heart to those things that gave you joy as a child." hmmmm Animal Totems
says that you can move mountains with faith and trust. That's what I needed to hear!

Thank you Mr. Porcupine. Our engagement doesn't have to be for years. It is just fleeting. Got it, he says? Do you need more?
Faith and trust, don't get caught up. Stay in the joy, and stay out of the chaos. Ok.

Then we smell skunk. Ah. Not close but it seemed that it followed us, a whif here and then gone. Even after I got home, we had a glass of wine and then she left, when we walked outside the house again, Mr Skunk had just wafted by,

Skunk medicine: "I will not tolerate abuse in any form!" Self respect and self esteem. Skunks are fearless and peaceful.

Hah! BOTH animals are self contained, in control, and well respected. They both have their own way of defending themselves don't they?

This is a good message for me when I am in the midst of helping someone through gaining their lifeforce back and changing an abusive relationship into a better one or getting out. Both these animals move through the world at their own pace and in their own way. They don't brag, they don't get messed with. GOOD WALK!

The Saturday Signs

These were the united symbols of our journey yesterday:

We sat under the mahogany trees.
Mahogany wood:
is used for drum making

Woodpecker came to us, 3x and made herself known
the foundation is there and it is safe to follow through
stimulate new rhythms in your life
and waken new mental faculties
You may be so wrapped up that you've neglected the physical
Listen to your body's rhythms and sounds and heed what it is telling you
Don't brood
This is the time for consolidation
Shamans ride the drumbeats of the Woodpecker's rhythm
into another dimension, space and time

Deer, came to some, who saw her, who heard her
a time of new innocence is awakening
the time of gentleness
Don't push towards change in others,
rather gently nudge them in right direction

Moose came to some, heard by some, felt by some...how did you respond to her? What was your invitation?
self-esteem
primal feminine powers
(did you embrace her when she made herself known "sniff sniff" or did you back away? Do you back away from your own primal feminine?)

Circular Rainbow seen by some not all
a sign from Creator of coming change
live in respect and harmony

5 great birds...
5 is the number of grace and harmony
5 mysteries
5 elements
5 is the number of motion and adventure

eagle/hawk...some said eagle, some said hawk...
eagle: messengers from heaven, spirit of the sun
be willing to experience extremes
be willing to use your abilities
be willing to become even more than you dream
hawk:
visionaries
"I am healed and empowered through my visions"
you may feel misunderstood when you try to impart an important message
there is never a moment when the universe is not trying to get a message through to us...

add your personal messages and bits to this and read the signs for the the shamanic day's adventure.
And remember-continue to let the message unfold itself to you
each time you bring your attention back to the messages, the symbols, the shapes, you will get even more.